Posts tagged ‘wives’

January 8, 2013

Where Did They Come From?

by pastortimfowler

SONY DSC

In Genesis chapter four we are introduced to Adam and Eve’s two son’s. Every time I read about their story of envy and murder I am reminded that parenting has never been easy and maybe, just maybe, I did okay, ’cause none of my kids killed the other; yet. There are a couple of things that we are told in this chapter that make people ask questions so I figure I will give my explanation. The first is, after Cain murdered Able, it almost seems like God gave him a really light punishment and even offered him protection. The second and probably the one I am asked about the most, is, where did Cain and Able’s wives come from? Both answers have a common answer. Let me explain.
The easy answer, but less acceptable answer for many is the one about the wives. They married their sisters. The other answer helps to make this more understandable and I will offer some biblical evidence for my answer as well.
Let me give an analogy to set the tone. In America there are laws against speeding. I have seen some speed limits as low as 15MPH. It is a known fact that horses can run faster than 15MPH. But when the cowboys were running around in early America on horses running faster than 15MPH, none of them were given tickets for speeding because there was no law against speeding. Sadly, today we have little regard for speed limits and the severity of this analogy is not the same as murder, or even incest, but, if there is no law, even if it is something wrong, there can be no punishment.
Now Adam and Eve were punished for their disobedience. They were told not to eat of that tree. But there were no other laws given. There was an awareness of right and wrong, but no law specifying individual deeds as sin. Romans 5:13Sin was in the world before there were any laws. But no record of sin can be kept when there are no laws. This is what explains the murder being treated with kid gloves, and can explain the “sister act” of Cain and Able’s marriage.
Today we have laws against incest. We also have medical evidence of the dangers of incest. But there are a couple of other things about Cain and Able’s situation that we must keep in mind. And there are some Biblical truths that we must remember as well.
Cain and Able’s generation was the first from Adam and the effects of sin on the human body were not as bad yet as we know them today. For several generations after Adam, humans lived upwards of 900 years. After the flood in Noah’s day, the lifespan of mankind was quickly limited to about 120 years, by God’s say so and the accumulating effects of sin which is what brought us death and disease. So the medical reasons for not having incest were not yet in place and there was no law against it yet.
There are two times in the Bible where marrying close relatives was necessary, or the Bible is false. Cain and Able and Noah’s family after the flood.
Many question whether or not God made other humans and they were the wives. Not according to the Bible. Genesis 3:20 Adam named his wife Eve [Life] because she became the mother of every living person. Adam and Eve lived over 900 years and could have many babies in that time. They were fully mature at creation and could have started having kids right away. There was not even many causes of head-aches then, so that excuse did not exist to not make babies. And we are told that sin entered into the world by one man, Adam, and was forgiven by one man, Jesus.
So that is where they came from.

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November 13, 2012

Extra Marital Affairs

by pastortimfowler

VANESSA & MICKEY-1068b

It has been all over the news lately about the CIA director resigning because of an extra marital affair. It was said that there were tens of thousands of emails that were sent between him and the woman. This has me worried. Does the director of the CIA not know that emails are not a secure form of communication? That aside, it breaks my heart to hear about this.
A good friend of mine and at the time a mentor, had an affair and it cost him his marriage and church. It really blew me away when I found out about it because he was my pastor. The only reason I am tell you this is because this stuff can happen to anyone if you are not careful. Sexual temptations are the toughest, especially for men, and it seems to be almost as difficult for women. I say that because everyone I know who had an affair did it with someone of the opposite sex. The marriage relationship is precious and delicate. What seems to happen is that it gets to the point of being mundane and callused and this is dangerous.
In a world where people get their feelings hurt for the stupidest of reasons, we have a tendency to take our marriages for granted. Marriage is a continual and demanding work. And, since the wedding vows say that marriage is until death, the work should never stop. Sadly we have made marriage very disposable and are not willing to work as diligently to keep our marriage together as we are to get to the point of getting married.
Most extra marital affairs begin with seemingly harmless conversation. Rarely is there a sexual encounter that starts things off. This usually happens because the conversation at home has become less than engaging. We come home after a full day at work and the conversation consists of; “How was your day?” “Fine”. How was yours?” “Fine”. Meanwhile the person at work that is potentially getting a promotion, laid off, or is working on a project with you, is talking in great detail all day. So rekindle the conversation. Flirt with your spouse. Don’t allow ‘fine’ to be the whole answer. Knowing the stress of your spouse or the joy of the spouse allows for you to keep that emotional bond in tact. It is those emotional bonds that become strained and eventually broke that leads to an affair.
Find a couple that has a strong marriage that has been married a few years longer than you. We all need a mentor and a marriage mentor can help when things are getting tough. Developing a relationship with someone who has a long and successful marriage is a great way have some support and encouragement when things are tough and everyone else is telling you to quit. We have people in our lives that help us at work, at play, and financially, so why not a marriage coach? All those others things seem to fall apart when the marriage does.
Most importantly, make your marriage line up with the biblical guidelines for marriage. Before you start thinking negatively, maybe you should read it. The old complaint of wives obeying husbands is not what you probably think it is. God instituted marriage before He even started the church. It is His precious gift to man. There are promises of health, wisdom, long life to those who have a biblical marriage.
No, this does not make for a flawless marriage, but it makes for a forgiving marriage. And it makes for a marriage that both agree to certain ground rules that are not flexible. We do very few things in life that have such lackadaisical guidelines and yet is so important to everything else we do. But a biblical marriage can be a strong and long-lasting marriage and when followed with integrity can be affair proof.
If your marriage is struggling, get help. If it is not, help others. No, the national security may not be on the line, but your sanity certainly may be. And when your marriage is strong and happy, so many other things tend to line up as well.

May 16, 2012

It Is Not Good For Man To be alone

by pastortimfowler

http://www.flickr.com/photos/55935853@N00/3342210932/

Genesis 2:18 Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is right for him.
God knew that man did not need to be alone and I got to thinking about that. What is wrong with us being alone? Here are a few scenarios that I came up with.
1. The garden of Eden would have had a man cave. Man caves are places where men don’t worry about things that women tell us not to do. In a man cave, if you need to pass gas, you just do it. You don’t need to blame the dog or a child. Adam would have had the dog there, and because there would not be a woman, there would have been no children. But we wouldn’t need children, because instead of blaming the dog, we would be competing with the dog. Not only the dog, but without a woman around we could bring in the hippos. What man has not dreamed about having a hippo submit to our superiority, especially when it comes to passing gas. I mean, if you can get that to happen, then it would be time to bring on the king of the beasts, the lions.
2. Not only could we pass gas as we please, but we could have our own horse racing in our man cave. I struggled with what sport to watch because without women there are no other guys, so that means no football, but God did make horses and the garden was big enough for the man cave to be whatever size man wanted it to be and therefore horse racing would be in high def. live in front of us. And if the horses make a mess, no one is around to tell us to clean it up right in the middle of a race. In fact, we could go out after the race to get some munchies and clean up the mess when ever we want to.
3. The garden would have female monkey mud wrestling. Some are thinking why not have this sport in the man cave? Duh…a man needs to go out every now and then. And if we are going out, can you think of anything better to do if the aren’t any women? I know it’s not the same as what some of you are used to, but you also don’t have a wife to get mad at you for going to female mud wrestling. And instead of dollars, they would do it for a banana and because you are in the garden of Eden you have plenty of those.
4. Because men like to fix things, and women like to complain about us not fixing things, or how we broke even worse what we were supposed to be fixing, we would walk around making lists of improvements that we would get around to doing. Everything that God made was good, that’s what the Bible says. But every man knows, that with a little tweaking, we can make anything better. I am not sure if God would actually let us fix anything, so a list would be the next best thing. Making “to do” lists is as good as fixing anything. Men feel like we have accomplished a lot when we have a big list of things to do. Here is a list of things to do in the garden, without woman.
Pull up all those flowers and plant trees that have vines hanging from them. They look more manly and we can later swing from them. But we would need to dig a big hole and fill it with water around some of the trees so we could jump off the vines into the water.
Next we would need to get rid of all those cats. Men just don’t need them. After all, the mice God created were good, so no need for cats.
Then someone has to figure out how the duck-billed platypus works. So we would start taking it apart as soon as we build a table and some shelves to put the left over parts on in case we need them for a later project.
Finally, we would get back to work on the man cave, because we are going to need a wall to put a TV on when they get invented. You know that without a woman, a man must have a TV, with remote.
Now you know why it is not good for man to be alone. Thanks God, for that woman you gave us.

October 3, 2011

Could It Get Better?

by pastortimfowler

Incredible would be the best word I could use to describe this past weekend. Our church had its annual lady’s retreat and about 30 of our ladies spent the weekend in Tybee Island, Ga. From the pictures I saw on Facebook and the short conversations that I had with my wife, they had a great time and I am sure once I hear the details it will only get better.
Of course when I talk about 30 women being away for the weekend, that meant that they are away from our church too. On most Sunday mornings we will have about 140 people attending and that includes an average of about 30 kids also. So if you take 30 people away from our normal Sunday morning it is noticed simply by looking at the crowd size. But we notice it even more because many of these ladies serve in our church in vital areas. Children’s director, teachers, greeters, check in stations for kids, just to name a few. Add to the ladies being away the fact that we had our audio/video guy and his wife out and about 12 other folks who were away, and it was really noticed that people were missing.
I have to say that rarely do we have people who just lay out of church. The folks here have taken an ownership in what God is doing and for whatever weird reasons, they seem to enjoy coming. Mostly because people find God here, but secondly, they have real friends that come here. Not just people we see once a week, but people that we hang out with and have a real relationship with. So I am not the type of pastor who has to guilt people when they are away and usually when they are away it is for a good reason, not just laziness and lack of desire to come. Have I told you lately that I am a very blessed pastor? God has allowed me to serve a bunch of folks who are real and excited about knowing God.
With so many people away this Sunday I was expecting the worst. Although my wife assured me that things were well taken care of, I couldn’t help but be skeptical. All the other people who were gone had also assured me that they had things covered and that nothing would be missed. They were right. Although the people were missed, things went over without a hitch. I was so amazed, and I really shouldn’t be. That is just what kind of church I serve.
I also thought that because so many of the regular folks were out that the crowd would be rather puny, but it wasn’t. Sure those who are here regularly could tell that people were missing, but only because we knew who they were. We had plenty of folks and if those 40 plus people had shown up we would have been near capacity. Boy, listen to me whine.
My sermon this week was on using grace as the foundation to build your Christianity on. Grace is favor given, not earned. God just loves us and when we seek Him, He gives us grace and therefore we have favor in His sight. Being in His good grace is a special thing that anyone can experience, but sadly too many people don’t because they pervert who God is. God is love, not someone waiting to crush you like a bug when you screw up. Sure, if you continue to deny Him and never ask for His favor, He can and probably will prove He is able to squash you like a bug, but that is not His goal. His grace is an awesome thing that allows us a very personal relationship with the Creator of the universe.
Because of God’s grace, six people became God’s children this weekend. It is not uncommon for our church to see 3 or 4 people each week trust God, but this week with a lot of folks gone, God showed us that He never misses hanging out with people who welcome Him. As we were finishing our morning worship time I informed people that we would be filling the horse trough for baptisms next Sunday because there were 2 or 3 people who had asked about it. As the day progress and we came back for the evening Bible study, about 12 more people had contacted me about getting baptized next week. It wouldn’t surprise me if we see 20 people baptized next Sunday.
If you don’t consider yourself a Christian, maybe you find this hard to get excited about. But it is what God gets excited about. He is not excited about money or buildings or how important a person thinks they are. God is excited about people knowing about His great love and sharing it with others. So if you are not a Christian, first let me thank you for reading my blogs. Secondly, if you live in the Rock Hill SC area, come next week and see all these baptisms and meet some people who will be surprisingly a lot like you. Either way, the first visit is free and if you don’t like it you don’t have to come back.
But WOW!!! This was an incredible weekend. I will be so glad to get my wife home and all those ladies who serve all over our church. They should be really stoked for next weekend. Holy Kaw! Next weekend could be better than this one!